Marriage matters requires first having a healthy relationship with yourself. Once you achieve this ability to truly love openly and honestly, you will have the ability to be vulnerable with another. You will have the skill to emotionally hold another human being when they are in conflict or feeling trauma. You will be able to calm and reassure your partner’s fears and reinforce their trust of you. You will create safety and security, through consistency and reliability, in a responsive way. Loving someone is less a feeling and more an action of being present by extending yourself beyond your normal capacity to your loved one.Giving Up Defenses to Make Love Work 1. Self Righteousness 2. Not Punishing 3. Being Less Hostile 4. Becoming Less Controlling 5. Stop Manipulating 6. Don’t Be Self Absorbed 7. Be Less Impatient
Do You Think You Are Relating with Unrealistic Hope?