WHY SHARING A MAN IS TOXIC FOR YOUR EMOTIONAL HEALTH

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WHY SHARING A MAN IS TOXIC FOR YOUR EMOTIONAL HEALTH

Audrey Chapman advises weighing the pain you are feeling against the prospect of loss, “When you wake up every morning aching with emotional pain, you have to ask yourself what you’re getting out of the relationship. Too often, women are so oriented to giving that they lose sight of what they need. “

According to Chapman, here are some common, destructive symptoms of man-sharing:

  • Compulsive jealousy. Do you find yourself constantly checking your mate’s pockets, wallet and desk drawers – searching for the details of his involvement with the other woman? Do you find yourself doubting the things he tells you, without specific reason for doing so?

  • Constant Pain. Do you feel physical discomfort more accurately than usual – throbbing headaches, for example? Your body may be translating psychological malady into physical distress.

  • Depression. Do you feel apathetic or miserable? Are you drinking more than you know is good for you? You may be turning your anger inward. It’s probably better to destroy the relationship instead.

  • Loss of self-esteem. Are you obsessed with worry over how to be better than the other woman in his life? Do you find yourself dressing in a way that feels

uncomfortable to you or affecting mannerisms and interests that aren’t really yours? Don’t measure your worth against another person.

  • Guilt. Deep down, do you believe that nonexclusive sexual relationships are immoral? If the man you’re sharing is married, do you think he is betraying his wife?

  • Powerlessness. Do you rely on this man you’re sharing to make all the decisions about your relationship – where and when to meet, how long you’ll be together, how you’ll introduce him to your friends.

  • Exhaustion. Do you spend so much time arranging the details of man-sharing -scheduling meetings, looking for explanations or behavior or clarification of feelings – that you end most days feeling completely drained of energy? Man-sharing may cost more time and effort than an exclusive relationship would.

“If you decide to leave, don’t be afraid to ask for help from friends, or even from a women’s group,” counsels Chapman.

For more help coping with any of these feelings, get yourself into therapy for support and advice on how to cope. If you are interested in a seminar/workshop please call 202-756-5042

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